I wrote this about someone I know who is using drugs and alcohol, basically hurting and making everyone miserable. Nobody can get through to her.

Beautiful
Money spent
Material wishes, cravings
All desires fulfilled
Distort mind
Fun, fast, just for me
Happiness for now
I think
Inside the box

Outside
Look, see
Family, God
Authority, structure
Expectations, See their pain
Hate, I think
Do not believe, Do not care
Break all, hurt
Destroy, abandon
Run, escape
Into the box

Inside me
Ache, confusion
Loathing, pain
Trapped
Want, need
Soothing
Inside the box

A bandage covers
Does not ease
My pain
Want, need
Soothing
Can’t find
Inside the box

Outside the box
Look, see
Family, God
See their love, devotion
Hurt, pain
Confusion
Helpless despair
Tears because
I am in the box, alone
Love, a salve
To soothe and heal me
Can’t get me out
Of the box
To help my pain
I cannot see
A bandage covers me
I am trapped
Inside the box

That is what I really don't like about this time of year.  The grey skies and lack of sun.  I could go for some sun right about now.

I got this letter in the mail from a group doing developmental studies asking if I could bring Thing 2 in for a study.  I talked to someone on the phone and told him that I would bring her in.

She is such a goofball.  She sat in my lap in this booth, and there was a curtain that opened and closed.  Everytime the curtain opened and closed, there was a person on the other side of the curtain who did an activity, and they studied how long she focused on something.  It was very repetitive.

Anyway, Thing 2 decided that she liked the curtain.  It was maroon velvet.  She squealed, screamed and tried to grab the curtain, and every time it opened and closed she laughed hysterically.  I guess you had to be there, but I thought it was really funny.  She also has discovered waving, and she was waving frantically at the person on the other side of the curtain while she was squealing.  The people at the study got a big kick out of her and said that usually the babies didn't get very excited because the study is so repetitive.  I guess she was in a really good mood.

Not much new is going on. It's really busy at work this time of year, and I am trying to get ready for the holidays.......

Help Kids See True Beauty

October 26, 2006

By Liz Perle

The Dove Campaign for True Beauty has a new TV ad called Evolution, which shows how a rather plain-looking woman is transformed into a billboard beauty. It should be required viewing for every family.

The 90-second spot lays bare the truth about what goes into making models and celebrities gorgeous. It will help girls understand the distorted picture of beauty being marketed to them day in and day out. After all, by the age of 17, they will have seen more than 250,000 messages about their appearance. And boys also need to see the artifice behind the almost-unattainable ideals of beauty that our media broadcasts to them at every turn.

We recommend that parents watch this ad with their kids because it's the perfect way to open a discussion about body image and self-esteem. The ad helps counter the omnipresent, unrealistic portrayals of beauty against which boys and girls between the ages of 10 and 15 begin to measure themselves. Eating disorders, over-exercise, and low self-worth are just a few byproducts of living in a culture that worships and broadcasts thin, muscular, pimple-free models and celebrities.

Although the media's influence is powerful, there are many ways that parents can raise children who view media with a critical eye and develop a positive self-image based on a variety of role models and influences -- not just the ones in the magazines, on TV, and in movies. Here are some suggestions:

Watch the ad with your kids. Either go to www.campaignforrealbeauty.com or watch it on Google Video or YouTube.

Ask kids for their reaction. This is about opening a dialogue. Were your kids surprised by the ad? Did they think the woman was plain or beautiful before?

Broaden the discussion. Ask kids whether they think their favorite celebrities go through this kind of transformation -- and whether they think the celebrities would be as popular if they didn’t.

Bring the discussion back to your children. Do they feel pressure to be thin? Beautiful? Built? Do they think beauty and popularity go together? Why? How do they feel about their own looks?

What other examples can they think of? What other celebrities and models come to mind as examples of unrealistic images of beauty? Who do they find beautiful who doesn’t fit the skinny/Calvin Klein underwear model molds?

Share your own experiences and insecurities and how you coped with them. You want your kids to know you understand. After all, this is just he beginning of a life-long dialogue.

Remember that it might be easier for your kids to talk about their friends or about celebrities than about themselves. Adolescence and insecurity go hand-in-hand, and when it comes to beauty and body image, kids are not only very sensitive, but they're also quick to find their parents judgmental.

Seen the ad? Discuss it now on our blog.

I don't know what is with me today.  I could curl up and go to sleep.  Probably not a smart thing to do at work.  I could go for sweats, the couch and a book right about now.  This is very snuggly weather.

I got a call from my mom today that she got an invitation from my cousin for her daughter's birthday party.  The invitation was sent to my mom and "the girls", meaning my daughters.

I was quite irritated.  I have two cousins who have done this more than once  They have a party for their kids, and then they invite my kids by sending my mom an invitation.  I am on good terms with my cousins, so I can't figure out why they don't send the invitation to my house.  I feel that if they want my kids to attend the birthday party, then the invitation should come to me and not my mom. 

My mom says that (a) they don't have my address, to which I say-it's in the phone book; (b) they don't know my last name to look my name up in the phone book, to which I say-I have been married for almost 10 years and if they are that stupid that they still don't know my married name after all that time, they can call my mom and ask (c) they don't want to hurt my other brothers and sisters by sending and invitation to me and not them, to which I say-I am sure that my other brothers and sisters don't care, and would understand since my kids are close in age to my cousins' kids.

This really bugs me, and it bugs me that my mom doesn't side with me more.  She wants my kids to go to the party to show them off (in her opinion, they are much cuter than the other kids.....whatever).  I understand that, but I don't think that my kids should go if my cousin wasn't polite enough to send the invitation to my house and acknowledge that I am their mother.  They aren't missing much by not going.

Oh well, I am too sleepy to think about this now.

I can't help it.

Why are men so obsessed about farting?  I grew up with brothers who thought it was hilarious every time they stunk up a room.  Every man I dated was proud of his farts. My husband and his brothers actually have involved conversations about their gas.

Every time my husband passes gas and smells up the room, I look at him and say "did you fart?" and he just looks at me and starts cracking up.  I don't get it.  Why is it so funny?  One time, he passed gas while we were sleeping and the smell actually woke me up.  I got out of bed and started fanning the sheets, and he asked me what I was doing. I said that the smell of his gas was so bad that it woke me up.  He about fell out of bed he was laughing so hard.  It doesn't bother me, I am used to it because I grew up with brothers-I just don't understand why it is so funny and why men are so proud of their farts.

Sorry-this is a gross subject, but I just had to write about it.

On another note-every man I have known has always played the TV and radio really, really loud.  Why is that?

It's been a tough week at work, and my two Things have been testing me this week.  I am glad it's Friday.

Thing 1 is at the stage where she wants to challenge everything I say....fun for me.  Her favorite expression now is ewwwwwwwww.........!!!

"What are we having for dinner?"  Meatloaf "Meatwoaf????  Ewwwwwww"  "I don't want to wear that shirt......ewwwww!!!!!" 

Unfortunately for her, I am deaf to her ewwwwwwwwws and she still has to eat her meatloaf and wear the shirt she doesn't like.  Poor Thing 1.

Thing 2 has decided that she doesn't like her bottle anymore.  I switched her from formula to whole milk because she wasn't taking it, but she still doesn't drink very much, and she doesn't want a cup either.  I am seeing a new tooth come in, so maybe it hurts her to suck on a bottle.  She is eating people food now, and she seems content, so I won't worry about it for now.  I think that Thing 1 did the same thing when she was that age.

Tonight is bath night.  That's a hot way to spend a Friday night.  Since Thing 2 is older now, she and Thing 1 take baths together which I find quite entertaining.  Thing 2 has one of those rings that suction to the bottom of the tub, but she can still inch it forward.  So she inches, and inches until she is right next to Thing 1, and then she splashes and splashes and Thing 1 gets really mad.  It's really funny....I guess you have to be there.

Not much else is going on with me.  Sweetest Day is tomorrow, but my husband and I have decided that we just don't care.  We are going to celebrate with pizza and beer.

So it's time for Thing 1 to go to preschool.  I have been really spoiled because my mom has been watching my kids, and though she does charge me, she charges very little. 

It will cost me $100/week to send Thing 1 to preschool for 3 days a week.  Ouch.  I thought that it wouldn't be so bad because it would only be temporary until she starts kindergarten.

Then I started looking into extended care for when she goes to grade school.  Kindergarten is only for 1/2 day, and then she would be bussed to another location for kindergarten extended care.  Since school starts after I have to be to work, I would have to drive her to extended care, they would bus her to school, and then she would be bussed to extended care after school for 1/2 day.  If I did PM kindergarten, I would have to take her to school on my lunch hour every day and then she would be bussed to extended care for 2 hours.  My school system is not really near my mom, so I don't want to ask her to drive to drop off/pick up Thing 1 every day.  She's not getting any younger.

I am a little uncomfortable with a five year old having to get on a bus for extended care.  I am sure that they take good care of the kids, but it still makes me nervous.  Plus, it would cost me $2500 a year in extended care fees if she went to AM kindergarten, and $2,000 a year if she sent to PM kindergarten.  Ouch

My other option is to send her to a private school near my mom's house.  They have all day kindergarten there, and I could take her there before school because they start at 8am and then my mom could walk to the school to get her and take her to her house at 3pm.  The tuition is $1,800, which is cheaper than extended care in my school system. 

Isn't that crazy?  I moved to my house for the good school system, so that I wouldn't have to send my kids to private school, and now I am finding out that it is cheaper to just send them to private school.

Since all of the elementary school information was on the same webpage, I investigated further.  Extended care for the elementary school starting in grade 1, the kids would go to the school cafeteria, which makes me feel better since the kids don't have to be bussed, but when I calculated the hourly rate at having to stay at extended care for 3 hours per day, I found that it will cost me $2,500/yr to pay for extended care for Thing 1, and then I would have to pay an additional $2,100/hr for Thing 2 once she begins elementary school.  So, I would be paying $4,600/yr in extended care fees for both kids once they are both in elementary school.  Ouch.  What kills me is that it will STILL be cheaper for me to send them to private school where they can go to my mom's after school.  Why did I bother moving?  I discussed this with my husband and we have decided that we simply won't have any money until Thing 1 is in the 6th grade and can stay at home with Thing 2 until we come home from work.

So this pretty much has wrecked my morning.  My only consolation is that this is pretty far down the road and we just moved into the neighborhood.  Maybe I can find a mom who has a child the same age as Thing 1 and can help me by watching her after school.  We'll see.  Oh well, we'll figure it out.  We always do.

I have been really frustrated lately.  I guess I'm in a self pity mode and what better place to vent?

I get tired sometimes of being the dependable one who is taken for granted.  It seems that no matter where I am, whether it's my personal life or professional life, I am the go-to person who gets things done.  It's not so much that I mind the work, what bothers me is that I know that if the tables are turned and I am the one who needs help, nobody will be there to help me.  I had a conversation about this with my husband last night.  He felt bad and said that he needed to do more to help me.  I told him that it wasn't the responsibility that bothered me, it's the fact that everyone expects me to jump when they need my help, yet if I need anything nobody is there for me and I can only depend on myself.

One thing that happened (which is really petty, I know).....one of my co-workers came back from maternity leave yesterday, and two of my other co-workers chipped in and got her a big cookie to welcome her back.  We also took her to lunch.  I did some work from home when I was on maternity leave, and when I got back, I got a stack of files handed to me.  Nothing more.  I am actually good friends with the co-workers who got the cookie, and I did say "gosh, I wish I had gotten such a nice welcome back".  My one co-worker actually felt bad and said that they were so swamped when I was gone, that it never crossed their mind to do something like that for when I came back-they were just relieved that I came back to lighten the workload. 

Again, I know that it's petty, but it really hurt my feelings.  Is that all I am to everyone is "the dependable one....the one everyone can count on"?  It's like nobody sees me as a person, everyone just sees me for what I can get done. I have a lot of friends, and I am well liked at work, so it's not like I'm a big jerk who everyone avoids. 

It's always been like that for me, and it's my own fault.  I get very few nice gestures from family, friends, and co-workers, and I am just tired in general.

I'm just feeling sorry for myself..........

I read Irishred's blog today and it got me all choked up (talk amongst yourselves......). 

I wish that I could stay home with my daughters.  They are with my mom while I work, which is the next best thing, but I really miss them during the day.  Unfortunately for me, we need me to work because I bring home the bigger paycheck, but I don't make enough where my husband can stay home.    Darn it, why didn't I marry for money??????????

In other fun news, our roof started leaking, and we get have it torn off. The fun of home ownership.  When we bought our house, we knew it was going to be a money pit.  For the last two years, my husband and I  have given up giving each other Christmas gifts because w e had something major done to the house.  Last year it was new windows.  On Christmas, I put my cheek against the windows, and said "what niccccccccccccceeeeeee windows" (I have a weird sense of humor).  This will be the third Christmas with no gifts, but  I get to go outside and admire my roof  (if there isn't snow on it).

On the upside, the house is big and in great neighborhood with a solid school system.  It bothers some people to not get any christmas gifts, but I really couldn't care less.  To me, my house is where my family is going to grow up, so the investment to make it nice is worth not getting any gifts.  It's much more fun for me to watch the kids open up gifts anyway.

My husband and I joke about all there is to be done to the house.  There is literally a list of a dozen things that need to be done-some more cosmetic than others.  When we see house listings that say "many updates" we laugh and say that if our house was ever put on the market, it would have to say "NEEDS many updates".

I had a really good weekend.  I was really exhausted from being so busy last week, and I was able to recharge my batteries.  We spent a lot of time playing with doggy this weekend, and we all went to the park to take her for a walk.  She is a really great dog and we are enjoying her.  She has had no potty accidents in the house either, which amazes me.

Thing 2 has started to crawl which is pretty funny.  She thinks she is really cool.  She hasn't figured out how to fully utilize her legs yet, so she is mostly dragging herself by her upper body.  She looks like she is crawling across the desert to the oasis.  She is also starting to invade Thing 1's playing space which is making her mad.  Thing 1 will be playing with something and then Thing 2 drags herself over and destroys it. 

Our new doggy really likes the kids, but she has figured out when they get really loud to stay far away.  She is funny because she looks at them like they are absolutely nuts, and then she walks into the other room and lays down.

That's about all that is going on with me.

I have been really busy-haven't had much time to write anything.  There isn't a whole lot going on.

We did get a dog, but we didn't get the kind I was expecting.  My husband wanted a small dog, and I wanted a medium sized dog, something playful like a lab or a beagle type.  I wanted to rescue a mutt from one of the dog adoption places we have here.

It turns out that Thing 1 is OK with dogs if they are little.  When we went to the adoption events and I took her up to the bigger dogs, she completely freaked out and started crying.  So, we ended up getting a really little dog.  The dog is about 5-6 years old and probably weighs about 10 pounds.  She was dumped on the side of the road and was found muddy and shaking.   She's the most pathetic thing I have ever seen, but she is also really gentle and docile and loves the kids.  She sits right next to Thing 2 like she is guarding her, and when Thing 2 grabbed her by the collar she didn't even move.  She just sat there like "OK, whatever".  She isn't really high energy, and according to the woman at the adoption place, she has barked once she had her. She hasn't had any accidents in the house which is good.

So that's about it.  We now have a weird little doggy.

What a week!  It's been CRAZY at work.  I am quite worn out.

The good news is I have lost 10 lbs at Weight Watchers.  Yay!  I would like to lose another 10-15, and then I will be at a good weight.

I am always telling Thing 1 to behave and to stop running around the house because she is going to fall down and get hurt.  Every time she runs through the house, she either falls or crashes into something.  She's not the most coordinated child (comes from hubby's side of the family).  Last night, when I told her to behave, she said, "I don't want to behave, I want to run and get hurt".  I found that quite amusing.

Thing 2 has decided that she likes dogs.  My mom and brother-in law both have dogs for her to play with.  She likes to have her feet licked. She actually likes to have her hands and face licked too, but I have to keep the dogs away from those areas.  She tries to lick the dogs back.  She lunges towards them with her tongue sticking out.   It's very comical.

My husband and I have talked, and we have decided to get a dog.  He is more reluctant about it than I am-he likes pets, but he doesn't really like to care for pets.  He hates cats, which is fine because I don't really want to clean out a litter box.   We don't really want a puppy-we would like to adopt a dog from a rescue network.   I just have to see if I can find a dog that is good with kids.  I want a medium sized dog.  I don't like little yippy dogs, but I don't want a 70 lb dog either.   I'll have to check and see what I can find.

That's all that's happening to me this week.  I hope everyone else's week has gone well. 

So, my husband's family came in town this weekend to go on their un-child friendly day trip (I blogged about this before).  I decided not to take the kids, but I did try unsuccessfully to get a babysitter.  I told my husband to go ahead and go and I stayed home with the kids and went grocery shopping and cleaned the house.  Fun.

My mother-in-law did feel bad about my not going, which is something.  I think she finally realized that she should have planned something where my kids could have gone.  So, she said that they would get back early enough so that we could all go together to dinner and the kids and I could be included.  Sounds great.

My husband called me and informed me that the restaurant that they decided to go to is about 25-30 minutes from my house in a bad area of town, where I would have to drive through that bad area to get there.  Yes, I would have to drive the kids by myself at night-oh and there is a great deal of construction going on in that area.  The kicker is that the same restaurant is down the street five minutes from my house, AND the hotel that my in-laws are staying at is by my house as well.  I FINALLY stood up for myself and said that the kids and I were tired, that I wasn't driving through a bad area by myself with the kids, and that it was ridiculous that we weren't going to the restaurant by my house.  I told them to just go ahead and go to dinner without me.  I wasn't mean about it, I didn't yell at my husband or anything, I just said sorry, I think I'll pass.  Five minutes later, my husband called back and said that we were going to go to the restaurant by my house.  What a good idea.

I need to stand up for myself more.

I love E-Bay.  I am completely addicted.  You can find anything there. I got a really great camera for about half of what I would have paid if I would have gone to the store and bought it.  I love it and I use it all the time.  I have sold a few things too, although that is too much hassle for me.

My husband has always thought I was crazy, but recently I have found two items that he really wanted and couldn't find anywhere.  He is starting to look at E-Bay in a whole new light.............

If E-Bay was crack, I'd be in big trouble.  Target too.  Whever I go in to Target, I go thinking that I'm going to get a roll of paper towels, and then I end up spending $100.  How does that happen to me?

Have you found anything good on E-Bay?

My mother-in-law is coming into town with my step-father in-law.  They want to see us and the kids, as well as my brother and sister-in-law and their kids.

My mother-in-law wanted to do something this Saturday with the family, however, she has decided to go somewhere that is not very conducive to babies and small children because that is where my step-father in-law wants to go.  My nephews are old enough that this should not be a problem because they are middle school and junior high age, but it would be extremely difficult for me to take my kids, especially Thing 2 because where they want to go is about an hour from our house, so we would be gone all day and I would have to pack a days supply of bottles, baby food, etc.  It would not be easy to take a cooler, etc.

My husband and pretty much everyone I have talked to feel that it would not be a good idea to take my kids.  I don't have anyone to leave them with, so I have to stay home with them.  My husband talked to his mom, but she is pretty much set on where they are going, and isn't willing to change the plan.

Is it wrong for me to be irritated about this?  It's not that I mind staying home while my husband goes-it's his family.  It's just that the point of this visit was for her to see family, so why would she choose to do something where it's not easy to deal with small children?  There are quite a few things to do in our area where I could take the kids, so I am a little disappointed.  I guess I'll take my kids on their own outing that day.

I am back from vacation.  I had a good time with the girls.  They make me laugh.  My husband didn't bother to wear sunscreen because he wanted some "color" and proceeded to sunburn his entire upper half.  Due to this, he started peeling.  Thing 1 was both fascinated and grossed out by this, and she somehow got it into her head that if she went swimming, all her skin would peel off.  I tried to explain to her that daddy's skin was peeling because he didn't wear sunscreen, and not because he went swimming.  He is such a great role model.

Thing 2 is really into her feet right now.  I like to hold her in my lap and play with her feet.  We do pattyfoot, and  I also do little dances with her feet and sing silly songs.  She loves it.  When she wants to play, she will grab my arm and put her foot in my hand.

Now I am back to working and looking at a picture of them.  I miss my girls.

I have joined Weight Watchers to lose some baby weight.  It's a really good diet, but I could really go for some chili cheese fries.   Mmmmmmmmmmmm.  Chili cheese fries are good for you, right?  You're eating a vegetable, getting protein with the cheese and ground beef, and the beans are good fiber.  I wish.

I am trying to drink all of the water that they want you to drink with this diet.  As a result, I have been trying to cut out caffeine.  I am about ready to fall asleep at my desk.  My frisky husband was sorely disappointed last night when I fell asleep at 9:30.  Give me a few days, I'll adjust.

The pictures with the kids went well.  It didn't start out good, Thing 1 was freaking out about getting her picture taken, and she was making Thing 2 cry.  The manager came by and started tickling their feet with a feather duster and they both started cracking up.  I have some really good pictures.  It makes me feel swell that it took a total stranger to get my kids under control.  Oh well.

Nothing much else is happening here.  I am really busy at working getting ready to go on vacation, and I am really, really, really hungry.

I am getting the kids' portraits taken on Saturday, and the very thought makes me shudder.  I need new pictures of the kids-the last portraits were done in February. 

You would think that the problem would be with Thing 2 being fussy since she is a baby.....nooooooooo.  Thing 1 is a complete pain in the butt whenever you go to get her picture taken.  I have to bribe her with candy, ice cream, you name it to get her to agree to get her picture taken.  Then when we get there, she is gets scared, then she gets fidgety and sticks her hands in her mouth.  On top of that, Thing 1 is not especially fond of Thing 2, so I have to come up with a whole new set of bribes to get them to sit together.  What's funny is that Thing 1 is very good natured usually-just not when she gets her picture taken.

Hopefully I won't go completely insane. Maybe I will just a little.

I thought that today would be a relatively peaceful day because usually my Mondays suck and my Tuesdays are pretty productive.  That theory has pretty much been shot to hell today.

Everyone has been absolutely insane today.  My co-worker and I decided to go to lunch to get away from all the nut cases, and as we got to talking about our crazy morning, we decided that it had to be a full moon today.  Sure enough, I looked on my calendar when I got back to my office and it's a full moon today.

I think my husband is irritated with me, but I have no clue why.  He's like a woman.  When I am mad, I just tell him what he did to tick me off and then we move on.  My husband sulks and gets moody, and when I ask him what's wrong, he says "nothing".  Then about a week or two later, he'll say something like, "I was really pissed at you last Tuesday".  What am I supposed to do with that a week later?  I need to smack him with a baseball bat.  Where's my bat?

That is actually a phrase that I use when people annoy me. Where's my bat????  I think it's really funny, but I'm pretty sure that I am the only one who finds it amusing.

One of my bosses likes to frequent my office daily because I have a mini fridge that the department uses, so she comes in often to get her snacks.  She says I am a bad influence because whenever she comes into my office she talks to me for 20 minutes.  I have a gift for people telling me personal things that they won't usually  tell anyone else.  I have no idea why people tell me half the things that they say.  I guess because I don't judge or repeat. 

Anyway, my boss has decided that si nce everyone tells me all of their problems and personal stuff that I am like Lucy from Charlie Brown.  She has that psychiatrist stand that Charlie Brown goes to where she charges 5 cents and has the sign that says "the doctor is in".  My boss also said that I am like Lucy because I am bossy and crabby.  I would've gotten offended, except that it is kind of true. At least I admit it.

I love to ramble.

I was watching my Cosby Show DVDs this weekend.  I think that is my favorite show, much to the dismay of my husband, who is a Seinfeld fanatic.  I think that my favorite five shows are:

1. Cosby Show

2. Mary Tyler Moore

3. Simpsons

4. Everybody Loves Raymond

5. Friends

I love Mary's first apartment in Mary Tyler Moore, not the second one.  I need a pumpkin cookie jar.

For all you Seinfeld Fans-I like Seinfeld too, but I am not a fanatic.  It came it at #6.  Sorry

My husband loves Seinfeld and hates the Simpsons-he doesn't understand why I like it so much, so he questions my taste in TV.  To make matters worse, Thing 1 loves the Simpsons and has a Homer Simpson doll (is that bad parenting?)

Sometimes I wish that I had a job with a bit more substance.  I'm not knocking my job exactly-I get paid pretty well, so I can help pay the bills that support my family.

Sometimes, though when my supervisors rant and rave about deadlines and the latest projects that they're working on I get a little down.  Our projects and deadlines that we worry so much about are so petty compared to the other problems that people have.  I wish sometimes that I had chosen a different path.  Sure, I have a good career and I get paid well, but I don't feel as though I am helping anybody-I just help my company make more money.

When my dad was dying, he was cared for by Hospice, and the people who work for Hospice are the most amazing people that I have ever seen.  I remember my favorite teachers growing up and how dedicated they were to their students getting an education.  I wish sometimes that I had chosen a career path that helped people instead of companies.

At this point, with two little children to help support, it's hard to walk away from my salary.  I hope that someday, I can get to a point where I can make a career change and go down a different path.

My littlest one was really snuggly yesterday.  I was trying to get stuff done around the house, and she was extremely ticked off because she wanted me to hang out on the couch with her.  She is a mostly mellow baby, but when she gets ticked off-WATCH OUT.  She gets her temper from my side of the family. People try to get me to blame my hubby, but I just can't.  Pretty much all of the bad traits that the kids have come from my side of the family.  My husband is really mellow and nice, and I'm the vocal pain in the ass.  At least I admit it.  

It's hard to work when you have small kids.  I hate to leave them during the day.  I know that some day they won't want me to snuggle with them anymore, so I try to take advantage of the affection whenever I can.

My husband and I were watching Seinfeld last night.  It was the one where George told a girl that he was a marine biologist and pulled Kramer's golf ball out of the blow hole.  That show cracks me up.

My anniversary is coming up next week.  Is is wrong to tell my husband that I want jewelry?  I basically said "I want jewelry for our anniversary".  My friends say that's unromantic, but why make my husband try to read my mind and end up disappointed, when I can just tell him what I want?  I also told him to find a babysitter for the Things and take me out on a date.  I have no social life anymore except to hang out with my friends who have kids and talk about.......the kids.  I need a life.

 Nothing much going on here, haven't posted in a while because I have been so busy at work.  My employers are too dependent on me.  When I want on maternity leave the department practically shut down.  They threw a party when I came back.  It ticks me off sometimes, but hey, at least I have job security.  And useless business cards.

OK-I'm done rambling for now.

My husband and I both made a list of the top 5 celebrities that we would like to have sex with.  The only stipulation to the list is that the other person had to approve all the names on the list.  Here they are:

My Husband

Reese Witherspoon

Ashley Judd

Halle Berry

Kate Beckinsale

Catherine Zeta Jones

Me

George Clooney

Matt Damon

Eric McCormack

Tom Cavanagh

Mark Ruffalo

We really need to get out more.

There's nothing like being at work for 12 hours.  I miss Thing 1 and Thing 2 when I have to work late like this.  I am very ready for the weekend.

I talked to one of my ex-boyfriends today.  He called to tell me that he got married.  Isn't that sweet???  I was actually really suprised  because he is one of the most jaded people I know when it comes to marriage.  I never thought he'd get married.  When I mentioned it to him, he said, yes, I am jaded, but oh well.  I am actually glad that I didn't marry him, although, we did date for quite some time.  I married my husband a year after we broke up.  Guess it wasn't meant to be.

The nice thing is that we set a date to have lunch.   We always maintained a good friendship even after we broke up, although we both have gotten pretty busy and hadn't spoken in awhile.  It was a pretty bad breakup, but it's nice that we were able to overcome it and become friends.  We are much better as friends.